You've all met the fool. They may be fun to work with at times, but ultimately they suck the life out of the team because of the way they respond to feedback. When a fool runs an organization, people just stop trying to offer feedback, as they know it's futile. 

What follows is a letter I wrote in June 2012 to some close friends. We were vacationing with my parents, brother, sister and their families in northern Michigan. I haven't shared this with anyone else until now. I'm posting it here to help during ALS Awareness Month. For context, my brother-in-law, Patrick McGoldrick, had been diagnosed with ALS about 8-months previous to this family vacation. My prayers are with anyone facing this horrible disease in their family.

If you are a in the middle of leading through a crisis, I am so sorry. You didn't ask for it. You didn't cause it. You didn't sign up for this part of leadership. You have some tough days ahead of you. It's going to be harder and last longer than you can imagine. The damage is going to be worse than you think and the sleepless nights are going to be numerous.

Teachers are amazing. They work long hours for low pay (one in five have second jobs to make ends meet) and little recognition in a room of humans that often mistreat and verbally abuse them. They may not see a pay-off for their work with some kids until many years later, if ever, yet they keep coming back to work day after day.

Throughout my career for the past (nearly) four decades, I have worked on many teams. Some as small as two (right now!) and some as large as 500. Whatever size the team, whether a church staff or business environment, I believe there are several characteristics that help you stand out and get noticed by the leadership.

I’m convinced that it is better to have a leadership culture than a leadership development strategy. I’m not saying a strategy or training plan or process is bad. I just think a leadership culture is better.

Finding a new team member to join your ranks can be an exciting time for any organization. Yet, it's a process fraught with potential pitfalls that, if overlooked, can lead to less-than-ideal outcomes. I've hired hundreds of people and have learned these lessons from my own successes and failures when expanding my team.

In our work lives, many times we blame a human for something that needs a system. We run into the same frustration again and again, and we think it is a "who" problem rather something that could be solved with a system. 

As guys, there are things we do that makes it difficult for women to lead. It makes it difficult for them to breakthrough barriers to have more influence. By the things we say, the ways we act, or the policies we create, we relegate the women to the kids table. Or worse, to the kitchen. Most of us don't literally or intentionally do that--but sometimes our actions have this effect.

Having a well-defined set of staff values is an irreplaceable connector across your organization. These values shape your team's culture, help preserve what's working, and revise what is not. They promote unity and diversity, encourage consistent behavior and communication, and define the criteria for measuring performance

There are bloggers who exist (seemingly) to see churches fail. They love to headline scandals, and they sensationize their stories to support their bias that churches (especially big churches) are inherently evil. They will never write about restoration or healing or reconciliation -- all of which is happening at Willow. 

Authority is the ability to make decisions without asking someone else’s permission. So often we give a leader responsibility without also giving him the authority. Their job is clear--but for just about every decision, they must get approval from their boss, or accounting for every expense, or HR for simple personnel approvals. Or, they actually have the authority to make all those decisions, at least on paper. But in reality, they know you are going to swoop in and make changes.

When someone walks in with a resignation letter, it didn’t start that day. It started months ago. Anytime someone leaves, first their heart (passion) leaves, then their mind (thoughts and dreams), and the last thing to walk out the door is their body.

Have you ever been in a role in an organization where you used to have influence with those at the top, but for some reason, your influence has decreased? Perhaps someone new was hired whose voice now carries more weight than yours. Or maybe you are the new one, and although you have a higher position than others, you haven't been around long enough to gain influence. Sometimes it is more nefarious--someone planted the idea in your boss's head that you shouldn't be trusted.

Leaving a church is hard! Someone resigns…the pastors and leaders get their feelings hurt that he is leaving. It feels like, “John doesn’t want to play on our team any more. He took his ball and his bat, and now he’s going to play on a different team.” It feels very personal. Emotions run very high. Words get said. Insinuations are made. People are reactive…

Several years before the pandemic, the church team I was serving on went through a funk that lasted more than four years. Looking back, I would describe those years as a season of malaise. We had gone more than a decade with wind in our sails as everything we touched seemed to work without effort. But then we hit a season where it just stopped working. From the outside, it looked like business as usual. But it didn’t have the sense of “movement” and “revolution” as in the early days. 

You are gifted. You've been applauded your whole life for what you are able to accomplish. Maybe it is athletics. Maybe it is the arts. Perhaps, like Joseph of the Old Testament, you are good at everything you do. I meet some super competent leaders in the church all the time. They have fantastic communication abilities, they have effectively led teams, they are great at listening and shepherding a congregation, and they can design systems and solve problems. But sometimes this comes with a curse.

I would suggest the best leaders make very few decisions. They set direction. They paint a vision for the future. They look ahead for opportunities or threats. But great leaders make very few operational decisions. Healthy leaders are those who empower their team members, allowing them to make important decisions and welcome the resulting outcomes, even if it is a different decision than they personally would have made. They train their staff to make decisions by staying out of those decisions.

I had the opportunity to interview William Vanderbloemen from the hiring firm, Vanderbloemen, this week. I have been friends with William for a long time now and worked for him on staff for six years. He is a Founder and author, his most recent book is Be The Unicorn, is available on Amazon now.

Recent report: Those making less than $25,000 believe they will be happy when they are making $35,000. Those who had a median salary of $65,000 a year said that $95,000 would make them happy and less stressed. And the highest earners in the survey with a median salary of $250,000 believed that $350,000 would bring them happiness.