Staying Home from Church Might be the Most Spiritual Thing You Could Do

I was talking to a friend this morning about this tension that we sometimes carry in ministry. You know, you work full-time for a church, maybe you are even a pastor, and there are times when you know that going to church is not going to help you or anyone else. Here's what I think...

• God does not live at your church. (I hear gasps of disbelief). It's true.
• Some of the most unspiritual people I've met are those who spend the largest amounts of time at church. They attend every Bible study, every prayer gathering, and sign up for every event and team. But if you had to choose between cutting off your leg and spending time with that person--it would take a few minutes to decide.
• You have to know what fills your spiritual and emotional tanks. Sometimes, that might be singing worship songs with hundreds of people. Other times, it might be riding a motorcycle or reading a book or killing large numbers of bad guys on a video game.
• Sometimes sleep is the most spiritual thing you can do.
• Our job as pastors is not to create automatons who come every time the church doors are open. We are helping people grow in their love for God and their love for others. Many times, that happens best away from the church property.
• I can tell when I'm feeling "toasty." If I keep going at the same pace, I'm going to lose my love for my job (aka my church) and will begin to lose effectiveness. When that happens, I need to get away.
• Don't worry about what people will think of you if you skip a service. Use it as an opportunity to let people know you are focused on your spiritual health and that's why you stayed home from church.
• Church attendance and involvement is a poor substitute for genuine spiritual health.
• When we as church leaders begin to see our people become less involved in the activity of the church, it doesn't necessarily mean they are backsliding or falling away from God. No, it might mean they actually get it now, and they are practicing the Jesus-life where it matters--in their relationships and community.

I love my church. I can't imagine a more effective place for followers of Christ to grow or for the unconvinced to explore their questions. I don't know of a place that has better artistic elements that soften my heart and open my mind. I've never been to a church that has a more dynamic teaching team to communicate the gospel. I've given my life for more than a decade to this place. And yet, every now and then, the most spiritual thing I can do is stay away.

Comments

[Larry]

A thoughtful post, Tim - thanks.

On looking up the defintion of 'spiritual' I was surprised to see dictionary.com list a it as a synonym of "immaterial" (ouch, does that fit your post thesis for what sometimes goes on in church!) They also define it terms of "concerned with, or affecting the soul." which is probably closer to what you meant by the most spiritual thing to do sometimes is to stay away.

I've been really blessed this week by folks stopping me at church and telling me how something 'minor' I've done really had a big impact on their lives. I try to remind myself that going to a worship service isn't all about me, it's about God - but it's at times like these that I realize a big part of "going to church" isn't for being spiritual or for feeling a lift, but for providing a lift for someone else, for encouraging others, for building up the body. The body is of course, the real church, not the building.

I agree with you sometimes the best thing to do is stay away, but also point out that genuine spiritual health in terms of a spirit-filled life making a difference to others - can't be maintained without church attendance and involvement. The irony is that leaders need to be told its ok to stay away while the uninvolved need to be encouraged to participate. (Sorry for pointing out the obvious but that's what comments are sometimes for, right? :)

[Justin]

Thanks as well for the insightful post. I am the executive pastor of a small church plant and I was the youth pastor at another area church for several years. While at my previous church, my pastor expected those involved in the church to be at EVERY single function, especially me. Every night of a revival, every single Sunday school, Sunday night and Wednesday night. Every early morning men's breakfast and church social...you get the idea. I was completely burned out by the time I left. I wholeheartedly agree that sometimes the most spiritual thing that can be done is to get away from "The Ministry" and get your focus on your personal relationship with Christ.

[L. Eugene Sparks]

I understand some of the points made in this article. However, I've never experienced 'burn-out' attending a Revival Meeting or making it a point to be at every church service. I absorb the presence of God in a special way during a worship service or a Bible study. It is true that I can fellowship with God at home or on a bike trail. God is universal and... lives within my heart. But we must never forget that He is the one who has called us to His 'House of Prayer' to reap the collective work of His Spirit in the 'assembling' of ourselves with other belivers. I don't despair if I have to miss a service through no lack of desire on my part to be there. However I do feel the necessity to make church attendance a mandate in my life, not just for my enrichment, but for the encouragement that I may bring to someone else in attendance, especially the pastor.

[Aaron DeWinter]

Interesteing thoughts. Thanks for being so straight forward and letting us in on it all. It will make me think in the future about this and what is best, instead of just assuming or going through the motions.